A limerick. For no real reason.

Just because…

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Once a vet, quite the lover of rats,

mice and gerbils, but not fond of cats

Made a fine pair of mittens

from some cute persian kittens

and a tabby he made into hats

And another limerick…meh

Nasty indeed

An embalmer who hailed from near Whiting

Found the deceased putrefaction inviting

Caressed post mortem stitches

‘till it stiffened his britches

Found the firm rigor mortis exciting

I do love me a limerick as you know…

Shall we? It involves body parts and a selection of greases

A stammering tart  from Calcutta

Rubbed her bottom with handfuls of butter

Smeared oils on her tum

Grease upon her front bum

“Ch-Ch-Cheaper than lube”, she would stutter

A Friday Limerick

Well it’s Friday here…

Loose bowelled Hermaphrodite from Nantucket

Had a penis so yeah, she would suck it

He would caress her clit

Explode cum, squirt, n shit

Near the bed kept a mop and a bucket

Okay so I realise that that first line hardly flows and is somewhat jarring but how often will I ever get to use the phrase “Loose bowelled hermaphrodite”.  And I wanted to combine with the limerick classic location of Nantucket which I seldom use.  Just let me have my moment okay 😊

Inappropriate Saturday Limerick!

Stay well away. You have been warned.

Friend of mine met a girl, dating started

Shit himself when he thought he’d just farted

He was out on a date

Though it turned out quite great

Coprophiliac, got her legs parted

 

Not sure what a coprophiliac is?  Google it.  Dare you.

 

Actually it reminded me of these from years ago…

Fetish Haiku – Chasmophilia

My Weekly Fetish Haiku 19th of January

Fetish Haiku – Forniphilia

Yawn, yet another limerick.

Not sure if this is a thing but I am sure it is somewhere. It works if you get the rhythm. Not that you want to . You’ve been warned.

A perverted yet grateful lass Julie

In bed, poo obsessed and unruly

Do a crap on your chest

In it sign “All the best,

Twas surely a real treat, yours truly.”