
Tag: beards
A thought…

A thought…
T-Shirt worthy!

A thought…
T-Shirt worthy!

A thought…
Think I need an early night
Okay so not so much a thought as the culmination of many thoughts. Arguments aside over exactly what the best phone is I recently bought me eldest the New Samsung on the basis that he promised to stay off of social media. Facebook, Twitter, Instagram and whatever else I may choose to broadly lump into that category. I will then, every couple of years, upgrade him to the newest handset assuming he has stayed off it all.
He happily agreed, and whilst in the future he may not, for now I think it is something worthwhile because I am pretty convinced that the damage done by social media outweighs the benefits. There will be studies I am sure, but I am not basing it on them I am basing it on my experience and the pressure it puts on people and the need to broadcast ones life click by click.
There is an irony in blogging about this I am sure, and my blogs do post to twitter, but it is something I am happy I did because I think the kids will be better people for it in the long run. No one needs to know what he had for tea or where he has just checked in to and he does not need to see only the selective best bits of someone elses life to compare his to.
I’d much prefer he simply lives life than spectates…
A thought…
T-Shirt worthy!

A thought…
Think I need an early night

A thought…
Think I need an early night
That was a long lon g day. I slept terribly, the cats eventually waking me at 4am after I had stayed up far too late watching ‘Bright’. The eldest went to a sleepover and went to bed at 4 and the youngest went to bed at 3. I said he could watch one tv show in his brothers bed before sleep and forgot about him.
He came down to tell us all about the great TV he had watched at 3 rather wired and a little scared about something creepy but I do not recall what.
We were all reunited at lunchtime to head on a couple of hours drive out to the seaside for the afternoon. We weren’t beyond the end of the street before the younger was crying because of something the other had thrown, the elder professed his hatred for me insisting I should perhaps stop speaking and the wife’s day was already ruined.
I think we just about pulled it back as the day progressed, mostly because the little blighters fell asleep and I heeded the warning I had been given to ‘leave them alone because I just wind them up’.
Families eh 🙂

A thought…
seriously…
I know this because, in a bit of a stinking mood, I stopped the car to let an old lady cross the road the other day and she gave me such a beaming smile. Admittedly, she was going soooo slowly that if I hadn’t then I would probably have killed her but that’s not the point. Cheered me right up how happy she was and how ridiculously slowly she was walking. You know, she is probably out there now. Hmmm. Oh well, that can be someone else’s good deed..

A thought…
seriously…

A thought…
Ready to give up yet?

A thought…
Ready to give up yet?

A thought…
Wisdom, for free

A thought…
Wisdom, for free

Limerick o’clock!
Yeah you know what time it is!
A quite lovely temptress from Dover
loved to frolic and roll in the clover
She would lie in the dew
with a fellow or two
caught a chill, went without a pullover
This molester in charge of the States
filled with anger and bile how he hates
The sick and the poor
and the blacks even more
and brown people with Mexican traits
A chap from Niece grew a large beard
said his wife “Love, it looks rather weird,
So perhaps have a shave
and in bed please behave
don’t come near me until that thing’s sheared.”
A butcher from Leeds who loved pies
Cant resist them, though trust me tries
Now his belly’s quite round
and his man boobs profound
and you should see the size of his thighs
A quite accidental beard.
A piece on beard growing and there is also a reference to a 3 way with the Clintons.
it seems that I have, quite by accident, grown a beard. Don’t get me wrong, I don’t believe it miraculously sprung up overnight, that would be silly, but I think it might have been sneaking up on me slowly over the last week or two whilst I have languished and enjoyed a fortnight’s holiday.
Alas though it is not a bear of much note. It is not a magnificent shag of a thing – full and glistening and well oiled. It is not styled or quaffed to accentuate my jawline nor is it the type that one might wear accompanied by the type of shirt a lumberjack may prefer.
No, it is none of these things and it does not in any way make me look trendy, sophisticated, well travelled or likely to be found sipping a rather pleasant coffee somewhere with free wi-fi.
It is instead a scratch homeless person affair which serves only to make me look like an ageing alcoholic with an aversion to bathing.
Year round, I am smooth cheeked and shaven headed for the most part and in fact I am usually rather thuggish looking in my appearance given the combination of the skin head and my tattoos. If I was to characterise my looks as a political party, then I would most certainly be Donald Trump’s right leaning Republicans.
It worsens though, because in addition to the accidental beard I also seem to have somehow acquired a ludicrous unintentional mop of hair curly hair to accompany it. So much of a surprise is it that I do not recall how I styled my hair when I was last in possession of any.
If my previous self was to be imagined as a statue-protecting-bed-sheet-wearing Republican then my current self is more likely to be caught in a very dirty pot fuelled three way with Bill and Hilary Clinton.
So what to do? I think I shall ponder my accidental beard and the accompanying unintentional hair and let you know what i decide to do, because the wife says she rather likes it.
Want to read more of my stuff? No. Don’t blame you, no offence taken.
https://afterwards.blog/2017/07/29/a-collection-of-miserable-limericks/
https://afterwards.blog/2017/07/14/probing-a-cautionary-tale/
https://afterwards.blog/2017/07/03/first-blog-post/
https://afterwards.blog/2017/07/14/we-unlikely-few/
Photo courtesy of Pexals @ pixabau
