Tag: writing

Were I at last to recognise the thing that we became

The thorny, bristling, spite filled rage

That spews from me onto the page

And like so many through the age,

At last I give it name.

 

My not again, my what the fuck, my who the hell was I

Quite compromised, unrecognised

And like those fools, philosophised

That I was there, just drowned by lies

And watched as life passed by.

 

And then, unshackled, this my thought

Regret no more, not turning back

And craving not the things I lack

now place your lips upon my sack

And kiss them like you ought.

 

 

 

In sleep I kiss your lips now cold

and miss the hand I used to hold

but god you made me feel so old

I’m kind of glad you’re dead

 

Heart’s drift apart when rent asunder

but can you blame you blame me there’s no wonder

from day one it was quite a blunder

should have listened to what friends said.

 

Mouth full of lies and legs oft parted

and that time you shit when farted

Inside I smiled when you were carted

to final slumber’s bed.

 

On and on such endless droning

pretty mouth but so much moaning

okay so I quite liked you groaning

when you were giving head.

 

But time moves on and people change

yeah yeah I know I may be strange

but jesus you were most deranged

and filled us all with dread.

 

So fare thee well, you did expire

now consumed with roaring fire

toast marshmellow on funeral pyre

I’m glad you’re gone, ’nuff said.

This cliff top wreckage of the place that once our hope protected

I stand and feel the chill of night as shadows slowly lengthen

And as my thoughts are drawn to betrayed memory of promise

Those icy fingers of regret squeeze tight and leave me gasping.

 

No night, no stars, no restless slumber

Horizon sparks and crackles

Into this tempest I will run

And scream your name one final time.

 

Lungs bursting, eyes red as the blood

That thunders through these veins

The words are lost as rising waters

Drag your ghost to inky depths.

 

And on that beach as morning comes and calm creeps with the sun

I turn , soft waves lap at my feet, and look back one last time

There in that place where love once blossomed nothing now remains

Your name now lost upon the breeze that blows upon my face.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

When skies turn grey, horizon’s shrouded

Compass bearing wayward, lost

I find my comfort wrapped in you

and threads that bind, knit tight.

Drawing  close such warmth I find

life’s colours woven through this cloth

though mended, frayed, it’s patched with love

and never out of reach.

This love, this life, our ever more

through storms that roar and rage,

my shelter until morning comes

and sun shines on my face.

Lips like fire set worlds ablaze

and reckless how they run

those crimson tongues charred ruins make

and promise they turn to ash.

In sweat soaked sheets they smoulder still

the merest spark brings it to life

and lies once more sing sweetest strain

until burnt out flame fades to black.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Mouth dry, full of regrets and lies

and fading dreams of what we had

they fill my mind when eyes I close

and raging ‘gainst the lovers sunset

I thrash between these sullied sheets.

 

There in the distance, silhouette,

you walk where once we lingered long

into the night and then slip softly

hand in hand

into someone else’s forever.

 

 

 

Backs packed and gloom descending

as the weekend nears it’s ending

‘Monday blues’ on twitter trending

and I curse that I have not yet won the lottery.

 

For Monday, it sucks balls you see

the thought of it quite bothers me

I’ve felt this way since after tea

and I curse that I have never played the lottery.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

One final sleep

‘neath blankets cold

of eath and clay and stone.

 

And to my end I walk at last

no evermore, or well lived past

and to the darkness wide and vast

I enter all alone.

 

And you shall be my final thought

my life, my hopes, my joy

remember me, the things I wrought,

my kind and loving boy.

 

 

 

 

 

Were I to hear you call my name

and turn, to see you one more time,

a souvenir, momento of what was.

A keepsake of sweet memories

I would commit to not forget

or reckless scant attention pay

for fear of losing priceless gift.

No holding back, no front’s, no walls

this truth I’ve kept for far too long

and though again you walk away

unburdened watch you leave…

When old and grey still close I keep

those memories dear to my heart

and ‘fore I walk to final sleep

and lonely paths to then depart

A final time I will relive and tender recollect

each smile you gifted though I often sadly did neglect

your light by which I found my way and through the dark did chart.

Love generous and without cost

so freely gave and not repaid

and eager how I ate my fill

as sunset sank beyond that hill

were dreams way back were made.

And so at last, though late I know

you lie as pale and cold as snow

and how I wish I had the time

of days were you were always mine

 

Hey week, yeah you, yes over here

it’s over now and how I fear

I need to let you know you suck

and right now I don’t give a fuck

about how monday made me blue

Tuesday, wednesday, Thursday too

cos Friday my balls oft caress

and leaves my trousers quite the mess

and saturday, well that’s hard core

my skimpy clad foul mouthed hot whore

Sunday will spoon me, there’s no lack

I feel it’s love pressed to my back

You did your best and hey that’s fine

something something 69!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Those moments where you cross my mind

and fondly I recall just how

we filled our days with blissful laughter

nights I felt such warm embrace.

 

And as I linger, holding tight

to thoughts I know will soon drift off

like smoke upon the summer breeze

I live again just one more time.

 

That once, that chance, that single glimpse

that slipped away and from my grasp

relived and dearly held once more

until again or never more.

If cut then I should surely bleed

were I not drained, face cold and white,

and curled beneath your naked branches

fade for lack of love and light.

 

Roots of dismay my heart entangle

moss grows thick upon my chest

and to the earth I am returned

at last, in peace, to sleep, to rest

 

 

 

 

 

Might I suggest if you don’t mind

you place your lips on my behind

and there remain and tender linger

and oh look, a middle finger

just for you, in fact there’s more

you offspring of a rancid whore

and siphilitic hobo dad

in fact I would be rather glad

if you succumbed to aids, grew frail

and had your mouth abused in jail

by strapping chaps called Whale and Moose

who’d leave your anus gaping loose

 

Happy Tuesday!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Would I

If given half a chance

and unrepentent dare to take

that single opportunity

and in the moment

live?

And would you

If you full well knew

that daylight would no sins reveal

and faultless you would

sit and smile

and contemplating

feel no guilt?

 

 

 

 

 

Eyes closed

pretending sleep

Under blankets as heavy as church roof lead

held down by the weight of the world.

Cigarette breath, yellowed teeth, finger to the lips

and harshest repercussions.

Not a word.

Don’t cry.

In the morning smile and say it’s just a dream.

A nightmare born in velvet plush and gold adorned

and echoes batter on the doors

and innocense do steal away.

No shame

No guilt

And ever more to pay.

 

A thousand sunsets I would give

for just one more night in your arms

and sorry would not pass my lips

though every moment stolen

unrepentent would I be.

.

And as I watch you leave

another thousand would I offer

and days to come surrender

for this now

and no tomorrow

 

 

 

In simple terms I will admit

that I can be a total shit

I’ll gladly steal your parking space

and leave the bathroom a disgrace

wont tip, will steal your secret treats

your cookies, chocolates, bags of sweets

and blame it on the kids no less

and shout at them until they mess

their pants and need some therapy

and no one will suspect it’s me

at work steal credit for your work

and be a bastard, dick and jerk

off thinking of your wife or worse

your sister dressed up as a nurse

and wish disease on you and yours

and puss comes leaking from your pores

while home I sit and read the news

take drugs and smoke and drink cheap booze

and eat endangered meats for tea

koala, whale and chimpanzee

and all the while I smile and nod

on sunday I go pray to God

for he Forgives so I can test

his patience as things I molest

and charities support with time

while I commit white collar crime

and then it’s home in time for tea

I bet you’re all a bit like me

 

 

 

And were I sorry for the things

I did not do but know I should

then every day would fill with tears

but resolute I stand my ground.

 

And blind to love and life and joy

and all the things I gave away

and most of all the hope I lost

when frailty I did not protect.

 

So blind I stumble, feet red raw,

and filled with rage and bile and scorn

for those who have what I so crave

yet threw away and cant regain.

 

 

 

 

 

Would I remember our first kiss?

God not a chance I was quite pissed

in fact i don’t recall your name

I think you all look quite the same.

 

I said it’s fine to save your pride

and yes you’re small, Im not that wide

you rattled all around inside

it’s not common as I implied

Well hey your voice was never sweet

not angel like, in fact you bleat

just like a sheep or more like drone

sweet christ can’t wait ’till you go home.

 

I drank too much I will admit

but you, you have to live with it

cos in the night I had to split

when in the bed you shit

 

My mum warned me ’bout girls like you

who drink and smoke and fight and screw

no wonder you came onto me 

youre just no catch, as all can see

Good luck I’m sure you’ll find true love

while up your arse girls things will shove

and things that we just shall not speak of

and none of us are quite proud of

 

 

and no I wont call you again

well I know I’ll forget your name

unless im lonely I might call

hey, better small than none at all

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Would I forget, though sands of time

through fingers slipped and whipped away

to who knows where and far and wide

and long forgot they lie?

 

And might those moments held so dear

evaporate like summer showers

and grey clouds form that block the light

that on my face most radiant falls?

 

And might I wonder, in my winter,

eyes grown dim and body frail,

those moments shared so long ago,

that may be mine to recollect?

 

Will I forget, this life, this love

this every morning by your side,

and will I wonder to the darkness

and there without close my eyes?

 

 

 

 

 

 

Somewhere in the dark recess

of thoughts and needs I daren’t confess

are images I do profess

to hold dear to my heart

 

Forged in the confines of my mind

and fires that burn, so bright they blind

me to the truth oh so unkind,

we’ll always be apart.

 

I’ll never feel your sweet embrace

for willingly I take my place

just somewhere else in time and space

blah blah blah blah blah blah

---

 

Oh god I am stopping right there I hated that it was so rubbish…My heart doesn’t hold dearest sweet images, if anything it would happily choke you maybe.  And who craves such sweet embrace.  Teenagers maybe and those in the first flush of passion but most my age need to get to bed instead of lingering with anything because they will need to get up for a piss at about 3am.

Hmm wonder if I am all poem’d out for a while.

 

 

 

 

 

I wonder would you judge me quick

if I confessed to cravings ‘sick’

in some folks eyes, but hey you’d lick

it if you’d not offend

And in your bottom you might place

or rub it all across your face

but you think that it’s a disgrace

or so you might pretend

But hey I know just what you like

search Amazon for ‘Dildo Bike’

they even do it as a trike

just say it’s for a ‘Friend’

You want it dripping from your lips

all down your stomach, on your hips

you’d eat it with some nice corn chips

I know how much you’d spend

On what you want and what you need

your darkest cravings then to feed

consuming it, ravenous greed

you’d suck it ’till the end

And yes I know that you resisted

Tarmacking or getting fisted

And Japanese stuff super twisted

But you would I know my friend.

So let’s not judge, you filled the gaps

in what I wrote and yeah perhaps

you might blame me for your dark lapse

but that thought I would contend

Though once you shone so very bright

and blinded me with all you were,

and could and, god, so should have been.

 

When time and life had took its toll

and each decision, each wrong turn,

had lead us to this desperate end.

 

I see you lying,  turned to dust,

and all you shone on dead and cold

and turn my back and walk away

In search of sun and light once more.