Nonsensical Hodgepodge – March Prompts 23/31

Curtain twitchers beware

M’s writing prompts for March came with the following instructions:

“…set your timer for ten minutes and begin writing about one of the prompts listed below. Don’t worry about spelling, punctuation, neatness, or anything like that; just write!”

Let us see what whimsical nonsense I can whip up in ten minutes…

You can see the prompts here.


Squirty McWhirty was really quite dirty

And Rodger her husband quite plain

He would dream of steam trains

They would fill up his brain

Whilst his wife quite love filth, kink and pain

 

Next door lived the Cooks she was obsessed with books

While her fella was quite into Cars

And they seemed quite at peace

The plain folk on the street

Though he also quite loved wearing bras

 

Down at house 22 there was Mr Rabu

Who’s wife disappeared last May

He said she was in Spain

But go check out the drain

You’ll find parts still not quite washed away

 

And they all quite suspect that there’s likely a sect

Who reside at the house near the park

Theres odd comings and goings

Nasty toings and froings

And oft candles and screams in the dark

 

Then there’s Darren and Paul who both work at the Mall

Vegans both, own a really nice home

But when push comes to shove

You know they’re so in love

Don’t like meat but they sure love the bone

 

A quite curious lot I assume that you’ve got

A good feel for the folk on this street

But don’t judge please be kind

We’re all different you’ll find

Smile and nod if you ever do meet

Sniffles and Snuffles – March Prompts 22/31

Vegetarians may object. The carnivores may not.

M’s writing prompts for March came with the following instructions:

“…set your timer for ten minutes and begin writing about one of the prompts listed below. Don’t worry about spelling, punctuation, neatness, or anything like that; just write!”

Let us see what whimsical nonsense I can whip up in ten minutes…

You can see the prompts here.


Sniffles and snuffles

fat pigs that love truffles

And turnips and carrots and swedes

They’ll eat slops and scoff bread

Cabbage both green and red

And leftovers and all that you leave

 

They think wow what a life

With this farmer and wife

As they roll in the mud oh such bliss

Every day they grow fat

What is better that that

They insist what a great life is this

 

Then one day Truffles aint there

Snuffles, nose in the air

Does despair but’s distracted as hell

For aroma divine

Cooking flesh of the swine

Snuffles slavers oh my what a smell…

 

 

Some Saturday night limericks

A couple of limericks about adultery, one about a man with a small penis and one about middle aged spread.

 

Just a couple more limericks.  Been rather tied up back end of this week and I went to the pub last night so all I have managed over the last few days are the limericks I scribble in my notebook when I am on a conference call of some description at work…

 

A bank robber from Toremelinos

stole to get cash for his penis

to enlarge was his wish

but the products are pish

now he’s locked up in jail with men, heinous

 

‘My Friend’ watches far too much telly

middle aged, double chins and round belly

legs and arms got quite thick

now he can’t see his dick

and his man boobs they jiggle like jelly

 

A husband one day proclaimed dead

seems his wife shot him right through the head

on his phone saw a text

“Banged your sister, you’re next!”

really made quite a mess of the bed

 

Farmers wife with a craving for men

got caught cheating again and again

hub quite angry threw fits

then he chopped her to bits

fed her parts to the pigs in his pen