Looking for Love

I’ve been here for some time now, and let me just say I am a big BIG fan of you earth girls. 

 

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Name: Darren
Age: 43 Terran years 
Relationship Status: It’s complicated
Pedal:Bi

I’ve been here for some time now, and let me just say I am a big BIG fan of you earth girls.  With the relaxation of the cross species breeding regulations I am looking to find someone who shares similar passions to mine.

I love musical theatre and long walks on the beach and despite all that nasty death ray business am really an old romantic at heart.   I adore late 18th century french poetry and I love to cook, and when it comes to wine have a great collection of Chilean reds which are just so fruity and a real treat.

When I’m not in the kitchen, immersed in Oklahoma! or enjoying the outdoors you’re sure to find me in the bedroom and if you’re a fan of probing then believe me, I am your guy.  With Calgarian College of Probing certificates in Entry and Exit Studies, Intermediate Intestinal Investigations and advanced Rectal Ruminations I am sure to delight you in every way possible.

If probing leaves you feeling a little violated then dont let that put you off, I have a ten inch throbulus and with a little yoga and a cheeky sense of adventure I am sure we could make it magical.

So if you’re looking for something a little different how about you swipe right, and let’s hook up and see whether I can make you see stars.

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In response to M’s prompt, ‘Meet you later by the flux capacitor.

Carrot Ranch Twitter Challenge

This was part of the carrot ranch challenge to write a series of tweets all 9 words each.  11 of them to make a 99 word flash fiction.  I managed to get the structure wrong as it was meant to be just 1 sentence but I enjoyed tweeting it anyway.

Omg date tonight with yummy coffee shop Barista. Eeeek.

 Oct 19

He took my coat, his hand brushed mine.

Lights off phone off show time. Sharing popcorn. Swoon.

rudely interrupted. Disturbance in the foyer. Police here?!?!

Getting the hell out of here. Wtf people dead!

Mum were heading home. Stay away from town

They’re everywhere. No way out. Police overwhelmed, finding shelter.

Just saw an old lady eating a police horse…

bitten. Hiding in Gregg’s bar. Scared mum, help!

He looks hungry. Worst first date EVER! goodbye…