
A pic a day for November…7


Another?
A young lady with breasts by the plenty
Caused a stir with the clergy and gentry
They declared her ‘Queen Bawd’
Surely sent by the Lord
But on Sundays to church, refused entry

Wonder what the return charges were?
A fellow from south of the border
Ordered a bride on mail order
Sent her back, wasn’t right
Was well used and not tight
And he wanted her hips a lot broader


Ive waited 30 years for this…
6 years ago I wrote the post below..
Tomorrow I am seeing her in Glasgow. Then again on Monday in Manchester.
I think it will be emotional…
——————————–
A while back I wrote here about my relationship with music, and felt that it was more of a series of filthy one night stands rather that a true romance for the ages.
Listening to a random playlist this morning I was reminded of the time when I indeed fell in love at first sight and in fact spent the following years in slow lovemaking on a white fluffy rug in front of a crackling fire with Kenny G playing the high notes in time with my enamoured thrusts.
It was 1992 and I was living in Knysna in South Africa. I went to the cinema, a ramshackle old place with the most uncomfortable seating, but working air conditioning which at the height of an African summer is a true wonder indeed.
I recall quite clearly sitting in my seat, and being early the projectionist had put some music on. This was no chain, but a privately owned place. Sitting there, as the music played, never had I ever heard anything, before or since, that resonated with me as much as the album he had playing that day.
You know that feeling, when something just resonates so deeply and perfectly that you feel like it’s what you’ve always been waiting for. Sometimes you will meet a person, read a book or watch a film and it feels like it was made just for you. Yes? Well that is how I felt when I first heard ‘Blind Man’s Zoo’ by 10000 maniacs.
I listened and listened and track after track just left me wanting more. I don’t remember what the film was that day, but I do remember heading up to the projection box before the film started needing to know what was playing. The chap was so excited to share as much as he could and actually gave me the cassette that was playing at the time that I could take it home and just bring it back when I was done.
Even now, when I hear the album – which I still listen to regularly – I still remember each song like it was the first time I heard it and I am taken back to that pokey little cinema with it’s uncomfortable chairs and the gorgeous melancholy of Natalie Merchant.
Photo courtesy of stevepb @ pixabay
Get living…
Once a fellow who defeated cancer
said “I’ll be an exotic male dancer,
living life is a must,
I shall work on my thrust
a spray tan and gold thong is the answer”


One of the greats…
Wonderfully pretty stuff by the incredible Ian Gibson. Picked up a couple more sketches recently and his Fantastic kickstarter project, Lifeboat

Its beginning to feel a lot like…
Filled with yuletide joy
Sleighbells and snow balls delight
have patience perhaps


I did stuff and went places and ate things…


























Its something…
“One ball’s shrivelled just like a prune”
Nervously he confided
“And I’m somewhat lopsided
Other’s swollen just like a balloon.”
Its coming!
Christmas looms very near on horizon
and the kids make their lists, things they’re prizin’
let the feeding begin
’till I grow a new chin
and my waist it increases in sizin’
Might need a trim
A hirsuite young temptress from Dover
You would see each time she was bent over
Not only her thong
But butt hair, thick and long
Which she styled in a fancy comb over
Age, comes to us all…
Long and tiring day
Nice cup of tea before bed
up all night peeing
Let rip…
I heard you’re quite bloated today
And you stomach’s all growly you say
Just give in, let it out
Unleash hell have no doubt
You’ll feel so much better quite soon
Words of warning
Love wains, they try to
keeps it fresh in the bedroom
Things in tight spaces

poop related
A faecal historian from Goole
Fascinated by fine bygone stool
How he took such delight
In a large corpalite
And if corn filled it made him quite drool
You might want to get it looked at
Oh poor lamb heard you’ve got gonorrhoea
And the symptoms they seem quite severe
Now it burns when you piss
You’d not bargained on this
When you paid for that hooker, oh dear
Oh theres another…then that all my art done. Well most of it.
I forgot I had this one too …Ok so didn’t forget,but forgot to remember
been a while…
Once a lad with a craving for butts
Would spend all of his money on sluts
Had none left to pay rent
Now he lives in a tent
Rents his out, charges extra for nuts