What Teddy saw. 7.

The one where Mr H gets his anus wrecked.

Part 1 Part2  Part 3 Part 4 Part 5  Part 6

 There are good days in this job and there are bad days.  Today was a good day.

I was fresh from rather pleasant evening in the toy box with School Teacher Barbie when I was rudely dragged from her quite instructional embrace and tossed unceremoniously into a backpack.  I recognised the insides from such previous trips as ‘just an evening at uncle Ralph’s and a ‘Long weekend at Aunty Carole’s’, both of which still cause me sleepless nights, so obviously I was immediately concerned about what lay ahead. 

I can still remember how Ralph’s chihuahua Tyson spent much of the night rubbing himself against me and asking me to fetch his bone and that is not something a bear gets over easily.  Chihuahua’s are notoriously filthy little blighters and I will admit that now just the sight of her putting on lipstick in the morning before she heads to work is enough to induce a mild panic attack.

A friend of mine was once forced to endure an extended weekend with a pair of them and a particularly horny dachshund and he hasn’t spoken since, the poor bastard.  God forbid anyone should eat hot dogs around him he completely loses his stuffing…

Anyway, turns out I was due for an afternoon of fun over at the Hendersons.  It was your standard playdate as these things go really.  There was a rather glorious tea party and an assortment of cakes and I got to make a few new friends.  Chad is a rather burly Steiff with the most fantastic German accent and whilst his right wing leanings may be a little out there he was pretty cool.  I am hoping to see him again soon because I think we could be good friends.

Oh and I even got to listen to some gossip when I was left in the kitchen for a while.  Turns out Mr Henderson is into ‘bears’ too though from what Mrs H was saying I wouldn’t want to be friends with them given what they did to his anus.

Still she got the house and the kids in the divorce so happy days all round…

Author: Michael

Husband, dad,(ex)programmer, comic collector and proud Yorkshireman. I have no idea why im here or why im writing but i rather enjoy it. no great fan of punctuation;

11 thoughts on “What Teddy saw. 7.”

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