Did you have a good day? Perhaps you spent it with loved ones working on those important relationships in your life. Maybe you were fortunate enough to find yourself doing something exciting or uplifting or perchance you just put your feet up with a good book and a nice cup of tea.
Sounds lovely right, the wonderous ways one can spend ones time. I suppose that’s what the ability to choose provides isn’t it – options and variety – two things that I lack as much as I do eye lids.
Do you know what I did today? I doubt you will guess, but I will tell you anyway. Today I did bloody well nothing. I was left face down on the sofa with my arse in the air when they headed off and there I lay for the entire day. Have you any idea what that is like? I doubt it very much indeed. There is a madness that descends and makes you consider the most terrible things when faced with such an ordeal.
Despite being righted and enjoying a few cuddles before bed I remain consumed with the desire to witness a violent home invasion or even a drive by shooting. I don’t imagine drive byes are common in this neighbourhood but it would be jolly nice were a gang – perhaps Mexican – to suffer a sat-nav malfunction and open fire on the wrong address. I can just see them now arguing over directions in their crisp white vests and distinctive bandanas. How wonderful.
That assumes they use sat-nav. A bear can live in hope I guess.