Read here if you’re wondering “why the bloody hell is he writing fetish haiku?”
Now, if you’re my wife then I am sorry wife, it was only meant as a bit of fun. If you’re my parents – you probably have yourself to blame to some degree.
Droopy, saggy, pale
Moist wrinkly crevice
Ooh god that’s quite bloody awful. Turns out some folk go mad for old folk. Older the better. Like way older than your mum or your gran probably. Think about it.
Did you? Yeah? You can never unsee that now!
Anyway, sweet dreams x