More revolting limericks

I believe that the limerick form can cheer up even the most horrid of subjects. ย What do you reckon?

There once was a butcher named Chuck

would sell any old meat for a buck

he’d sell dachshunds as steak

sell you minced rat and steak

‘stead of chicken you’d get pigeon or duck


There once was a Baker call Ned

quite a perv, things he did with the bread

doughnut holes…yeah believe it

used his bits to achieve it

late at night he’d take croissants to bed



A fellow, a candlestick maker

had a wife who in bed was a faker

so he took to his bed

brought his work home instead

now quite easy for him to placate her