A couple of rather rude limericks.

I am easily influenced, so here are some of the limericks you certainly don’t want your kids to read and to be honest – are rather crude.


Okay…a few of the ones that make me chuckle that I often avoid writing because they go too far in some regards but I am in the mood for going too far today.

There was a young fellow from China

Met this lass with a massive vagina



he would rattle inside

she would say “It’s so wide,

but was tighter when I was a minor”


For every vagina based limerick I feel it should be balanced out with a penis based one.  Just for good measure.


A well endowed fellow called Scott

has a dick he could tie in a knot

animals he could make,

dogs, swords flowers or snake

some girls found it incredibly hot


And just because I can one about anal sex.


lad I know, poor thing – anus quite wrecked

he hit forty so prostate got checked

turned out loved it so much

craved it poked, drilled and touched

far more pleasure that one might expect








You should be shocked at all of these and roll your eyes and tut.  If you dont then you are part of the problem 😉

Author: Michael

Husband, dad,(ex)programmer, comic collector and proud Yorkshireman. I have no idea why im here or why im writing but i rather enjoy it. no great fan of punctuation;

5 thoughts on “A couple of rather rude limericks.”

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