You did what to my Gran!?!?

Consider if you will, how easily a message is transformed by a casually mis-typed emoji.

I’m sure we are all familiar with the tale of the mother who assumed that LOL meant ‘lots of love’ and sent a message to her son informing him of the death of his Grandmother signed off with LOL.

Consider now if you will, how easily a message is transformed by a casually mis-typed emoji.

No?  Let me give you an example or two.


I saw your gran last night 🙂   is wholly different to  I saw your gran last night 😉

You accidentally add a winky face to that and it gets rather uncomfortable for me.  I’m suddenly wanting to know where you saw her because she should have been at bingo.  Then I want to know why you were hanging around her and why to god you added a winky face which can only mean something a little sexy.  I do not want you having any sexy time with my gran.  Good heavens.  Stick to a nice smiley and we’re still going to be friends.

God forbid that comes from like a parent or a sibling, that’s a whole new level of messed up and there is no way I can spend Christmas with you all.



Now imagine you were to send the following:

I saw your sister and her husband at the park yesterday.

If you add the tongue out winky face instead of the regular smiley face then again I am wondering wtf, was getting sexy with my gran not enough for you?  I am then forced to ask what in the blazes happened with my sister and her rather dull accountant husband Greg that required any sort of tonguing?  They’re not the tonguing type of people.  Please stop.

At this point I am considering having to ask you to leave me and my family alone.


wp-image-1226434679 wp-image-1755908686  wp-image-1729823862

There are lines one should not cross, and I think careful typing is essential to ensure that you do not send the message below with the smiley icons above:

Hey stranger, popped round to your place but you weren’t in.  Was great to see your mum and dad after all these years  

That is too far, I mean sweet Jesus what sexy stuff did you do that made you go all winky face and then then cry?  Was it both touching and deviant?  Were there  cuddles?

I now want you to delete me from your phone and call the authorities.

So there you have it.  Just a few tips…be careful out there.  Next week I intend to explore the incorrect use of the abbreviation for ‘At The Moment’.



Want to read more of my stuff?  No.  Don’t blame you, no offence taken.

Title photo courtesy of JohnHain @ Pixabay

Author: Michael

Husband, dad,(ex)programmer, comic collector and proud Yorkshireman. I have no idea why im here or why im writing but i rather enjoy it. no great fan of punctuation;

34 thoughts on “You did what to my Gran!?!?”

  1. I love how you build on a story – not just examples of improper smiley faces, but adding onto it with “was getting sexy with my gran not enough for you?” cracks me up! Well done.


  2. Or would it? That could get extremely confusing quite quickly with the wrong emoji…


  3. I don’t think I’ve EVER used an emoji. Civilization, with the development of written language, should have left the caveman pictogram behind. This is not to say I am anti-artwork, but an emoji is not artwork. ❤

    Liked by 1 person

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