My eldest son is nearly 13 and quite often smells like onions.  I do not intend to be beastly but heavens his room really is eye wateringly odorous.  It is not the quite-delicious-slowly-sweated-in-butter type of onion but rather the nose-wrinkling, eye stinging and nose punishing variety. 

This is not because he is prone to poor personal hygiene, he is not and showers morning and night and is often found in a rather pleasant if somewhat overpowering cloud of fragrance, but it is apparently a natural occurrence for boys of his age.

I did some research, worried that smelling like Satan’s anus might be a permanent fixture, only to discover that the stench that often surrounds him was a matter of a combination of  hormones and his age.  These hormones, new sweaty places and a general increase in sweating are instead to blame.

There seem to be a myriad of solutions that we can employ to help with the challenge of the upstairs bedrooms smelling like Beelzebub’s bottom, including more showers, anti-bacterial soaps and  frequent changes of clothing which is a real relief.

Until then he will continue to sleep with the windows open because good heavens it’s pretty nasty up there.

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Want to read more of my stuff that’s not about smelly teens?

https://afterwards.blog/2017/07/14/probing-a-cautionary-tale/

https://afterwards.blog/2017/07/03/first-blog-post/

https://afterwards.blog/2017/07/14/we-unlikely-few/

https://dailypost.wordpress.com/prompts/fragrance/

Join the conversation! 7 Comments

  1. This is our everyday ongoing battle with our boys. We have a 15 yr old boy and 14 yr old boy that are roommates so we deal with double the horrible smell oozing from that room. Lol. Funny post.

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  2. I loved your imaginative way of using of Satan’s anus, and Beelzebub’s bottom to compare or suggest obnoxious odors.

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About Michael

Husband, dad,programmer, comic collector and proud Yorkshireman. I have no idea why im here or why im writing but i rather enjoy it. no great fan of punctuation.

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