Our first night in the Van

Our first night away

You can read all about where this lark started here.


My youngest and I decided that we would head out for a night and see what it was like spending a night in the van. Not wanting to rough it too much I booked a place on a Caravan Club site over in Lancashire for just the one night. Only cost me £19.20 and a few quid in diesel and off we went.

We were a bit behind in setting off so made a hurried stop at tescos to pick up a few things and then we hit the road again. Now I am known to just make things up as I go along and having spent about £90 I was barely out of Halifax before I had a niggling feeling that I had forgotten stuff.

As it turned out I had forgotten almost everything.

Turns out that you need more than a couple of sirloins, some beans, utencils, bread and butter for a night out. Whilst I had managed to remember to buy a pan I had neglected to bring or buy anything to eat out of. Well there was one paper plate but that was it. I had also bought the world’s sharpest knife which I proceeeded to slash my finger with within moments of opening it which reminded me that I had forgotten any sort of first aid kit too.

But I am jumping the gun a little there because before that we enjoyed a rather pleasant walk around the country park and saw some ducks and a giant mouse trap and enjoyed a sculpture trail. All very fabulous.

Actually even that is jumping the gun because prior to that was the setting up of the van for the night. Not too tricky once we organised ourselves a little and got things unpacked. I did manage to unplug the electric from the rather surly Geordie taxi driver at the pitch next to us but apart from that no major issues.

So the walk was done and dinner was cooked. Tom ate his corned beef, beans and sausages out of the can they had come in and I ate mine from the pan. We then cooked a steak too which was fantastic though it did make the entire van smell like meat and that we just ate straight from the pan.

By now it was about 6pm and we weren’t quite sure what to do with ourselves. Getting away from all the usual distractions will take some getting used to. We chatted for a while and then watched a film on the ipad and ate a few biscuits and finished off the milk we had bought for no apparent reason. Well Tom did.

That is when the pissing started.

Oh god he needed the loo about 5 times over the next 3 hours and every time it was a case of getting wrapped up warm and making the trip across the site. First few times it was fun but by the fifth I was ready to try and fashion some sort of cathater for him.

Eventually he was empty and I had hidden all beverages and we settled down to bed.

That is when the farting started.

I am not sure the beans were right you know. Probably off. Either way it was a most windy end to the evening. We both slept pretty well and it was nice and warm with the heater keeping things toasty as we slept.

Morning came a little earlier than I would have liked but we both woke relatively refreshed and following a leftover steak sandwich for breakfast we packed up and headed home.

We had a fabulous time you know, and it was just great to get away and realise the freedom it gives us and make some new memories.

Happy days and next time we may even take a change of clothes and somethign to eat out of.

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Author: Michael

Husband, dad,programmer, comic collector and proud Yorkshireman. I have no idea why im here or why im writing but i rather enjoy it. no great fan of punctuation;

25 thoughts on “Our first night in the Van”

  1. That’s absolutely the best!! Who needs plates & utensils when you have hands? You had me really laughing about the farting. I would still be laughing, hence, no sleep. Glad you had a fun time with the kiddie. 😊

    Liked by 1 person

  2. A mid-Winter adventure – put those remembrances in with the other story you have written to each of them – memorable stories for them to retell to their kids. (Sorry I just made you feel old Michael!) 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Looks like you all had an awesome time. I’d skip the beans next time as well as picking up the plates. Do they do reservations in UK at campsites? A friend of mine said she reserves ahead if she can when going to an RV site to get a spot about two or three spaces from the loo, close but not right next to it. Not all places do reservations though.

    Liked by 1 person

  4. If you all are having fun together, that’s the main point. Besides I think if you had to climb a mountain with a backpack filled with your tent, food and a sleeping bag, you might be a tad grumpy by the time you get to the top and pitched camp.

    Liked by 1 person

  5. Yeah, that’s why I’m not into roughing it. I like the idea of a mobile room that you can drive, park and visit an area and then get to sleep in a warm place. What you’re doing sounds perfect

    Liked by 1 person

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